IT

Madhur Bhandarkar is working on his next movie ‘Fashion’. No points for guessing what it will be about. In the filmmaker’s own words - “I have been attending all the fashion weeks; have been meeting various fashion designers, models and organisers. No one has been finalised. Once the script is ready, I will begin casting, but as of now, the script is what is most important.”

So guys, get ready to see something like wardrobe malfunction, gay designers, undercutting Czech/Hungarian/random-Easter-European-country models, underpaid workers in sweatshops, child labor n exploitation... get the drift?

Thank you so much Mr Bhandarkar, for making us acquainted with the nuisances of Mumbai bar girls, Page 3 reporters n socialites, Corporate honchos, Traffic signal workers n soon fashion world. Pardon my audacity, but may I suggest the theme of your next movie after fashion.

I T

Yes sir, u heard it right, Information Technology. Cmon, please enlighten the whole country about these ‘poster boys of matrimonial classifieds who are paid handsomely, perceived to be intelligent and travel abroad frequently, but in reality are not programmers, but mere coders’. Let each and every prospective father-in-law know that the nincompoop he plans for his bundle-of-joy is a mere 'smart assembly line worker'.

Please let the countrymen know that the so-called software engineers are doing nothing but cut-copy-paste and producing kilo lines of code day after day in a single repeatable fashion. Tell them how the overzealous managers estimate 5 days of work by 4 people into a 3 day work by 2 people and we spineless creatures won’t say a word just coz they pay us well. Tell them that it requires an IQ only higher than a plant to fix the errors after market close so that all settlements can be done n trade can resume the next day at NSE/BSE. Tell them that scanning n monitoring a banking rollout night after night is something which your neighborhood watchman can very well do with some basic computer training. Tell them how we are also responsible for the sky-rocketing real estate prices.

Tell them how we salivate when we hear the words onsite. How dollars are all we think when we are awake or asleep, whereas other professionals traveling abroad are doing it for a) their love for America/any-other-country b) to help the citizens of that country in every way possible c) to make the population and space density a little less in India d) other charitable reasons.

Please , oh please, Mr Bhandarkar, this is something you must do to stop the millions of collegians who dream to be an IT professional.